Expanding my Vocabulary!!

I was going through withdrawal yesterday and this morning. Still doing a bit of that - since I am finally able to get back on blogger, but totally missing the post I made yesterday - hoping they get it back for me, IT's BACK - because it was is a really good story of Mo & Mer having a visit.........Here is today's and hoping it does not go away - :)

I learned a new word this week. HA UGE - yep - that's it - HA UGE - not HUGE - but HA UGE - it was pretty funny to hear. My friends daughter was sitting next to me on Sunday and as we were having a good laugh over a kids book on the couch she turned to her jeans and pulled on the tops of them. Well, the tops of the thigh - pulled at the fabric and it came up - she then proceeded to say - wearing her size 10 pair of jeans (I do believe they were size 10) - "these things are so HA UGE" - I feel fat in these things - I am going to have to change that".

Then just as she kept saying it I realized that my pants were HA UGE too. They pulled up even further then hers. I got this glow on my face, started to smile from ear to ear and realized that my pants have not been HA UGE in a very long time. Always tight, snug and well, never any room to breath. I am making progress!

The other girl on the other end of the couch pulled at her size 3 pants - yep, size 3 and didn't have any room to say that new word. I want to be like that. Maybe not a size 3, but to actually pull on my pants and not have anything to pull. And to actually be happy with the size I am in and that they are not tight, or stuck to my skin because I forced myself to get into them, just the fact that I will look good and feel good about the size I am wearing.

They both didn't mean anything by it - it was just a fun word. I didn't go into the fact that I do feel HA UGE in jeans, in pants, in shorts or anything else for that matter. That there are times I do feel HA UGE when I look in the mirror or see my reflection in my shadow.


I am working on getting that word out of my brain waves. I will have to think of another word in the coming months - how about

SKIN - NEE - ME, what about

LOOK - N - GLOW- MO, or another one -

MARV - O - LADY

Hey, look....I CAN expand my vocabulary...........

Staying MOtivated MO

A Mer & Mo Moment ---- together

So - I got to see Mer this last Saturday. It wasn't a very long visit, in fact, it was shorter then I wanted it to be. We were going to meet for lunch at 1:00, then it turned into 1:30, then trying to get to the meeting point took even longer and before I knew it I was finally enjoying a nice lunch with Mer, my god-daughter and the little munchkin on the patio of the very overcrowded mall at about 2:20 pm....it was a good meeting spot, but it just amazes me that so many people go shopping on such a wonderful, sunny and not so windy day. Really, seriously - do you have to go find those nice looking jeans now?? The visit was not long enough - only about 45 minutes, if that. I had a traveling companion with me and I didn't want to keep her, but at the same time I had been on the road since 8 am and we did a lot of shopping for my Day Camp preparation, in fact it was very liberating, but taunting. Mer looks good!!! She really does. I can totally tell that she is rockin it out and getting it done in regards to her weight loss journey. I can't wait to see her the next time as I know she is working hard towards her final goal.

My wonderful, special god-daughter listened as I talked about my jeans and how they are really not the right size anymore and she wanted to know if we were going shopping. I had to decline the offer. First of all, did I really want to go shopping? No. Second, I want to wait until the next size down to do a good new jeans shopping trip. And even if I have always said that finding a good pair of new jeans is like finding a man - when you least expect it you will find the right fit. I just really needed to get home - the day had been too long and was going to be longer with our 2 hour drive home. I will have to remember her offer of shopping the next time I visit.

Mer is busy with getting things ready for her Science Fair - it was just yesterday and from the quick text I got from her yesterday and even a simple FB post I know things are going and did go well. She has done this every year, but this year they were at a new site. I am missing her postings, but she will soon be back up and blogging again, I know for sure. Oh - Oh - Oh - I hope I can say this, but Mer got her ticket for Alaska and I am so excited that she gets to go and do a Science Workshop in a most wonderful place. I hope she will get time to do some sightseeing, but that is what Science is all about - exploring, right?

Mer gave me a new journal to fill up and am filling up - thanks so much for the gift!!!

We had a huge laugh over the fact that I wanted to take a picture of the two of us. We could not stop laughing as her little munchkin wanted to be in the picture. We let him be in a few clicks, but then as a distraction I totally got him to go get me a slice of apple - not once, but twice. I felt bad afterward, because I felt like I was being selfish, but even if we don't post the picture I wanted to have one with just the two of us. It was pretty funny, oh - the joys of distracting a little one.

I am hoping to do another visit with Mer soon, but it might be far from now, since my Day Camp duties are going to keep me very busy until the middle of June. We might have to wait until our annual River Camping trip in July. Oh, the wait is going to torture me......but to relax, have fun, walk down to the River, enjoy the sun, the time with the kids, no worries, no reality.....see - now I am wanting to go next week. Maybe I might be able to have her come up and help me one weekend with Day Camp - yep, that's the ticket - LOL

OH - and wanted you all to know that I have been enjoying my May breakfast mornings. The flowers in the backyard are giving me such joy this month -

Flowers from the garden, morning paper, 1/2 glass of milk, 1/2 c of berries, 1 1/2 cup Cheerios....and the sweet sound of the birds in the morning - a great way to start my mornings!!

Enjoy your Day ----

Staying MOtivated MO

Mother's Day Glow

Yes - I am a proud Mother - had the best Mother's Day this past Sunday - my little Aman loves me!!

         Scambled Egg Breakfast in bed - first time EVER - didn't even know he was making them - I heard noise in the kitchen and figured it was going to be cereal. I didn't move because I knew something might be coming my way and I didn't want to spoil it. To my surprise, he used the stove that I have been teaching him to use and the eggs had just the right pepper and salt - was a great way to start my day!! (Wish I had thought of taking the actual picture, but this will do - he did a great job)

                                                                                          

I then got a CREWpon book - yes, it should be Coupon, but we have been talking about those internet new things called Groupon and he was so cute and creative with naming this little book that he made at school....

here are just two of my many Crewpon's from my book - loving that he is going to give me money, but I would never "cash" this in

Love the Card - and the fact that there was a treasure hunt map on the back to go find my gift

 

Received this little VASE that he made at the Mud Mill (pre-made ceramics shop that let's you pick the item and then you decorate)

Loving my gift!!!!!!!!!

I then went into my backyard and cut tons of roses to enjoy. This is my first Spring in my new house and wow - do I need to do some trimming, but look at them blooming. Realized that this satisfies one of my May goals - now I don't have to go spend money on flowers - totally free in my backyard



Mer gave me this floating vase several years ago - what a great way to enjoy my blooming garden!!

We finished off the day with dinner in Sacramento with friends and family!! The best Mom's Day I think I have had in a very long time!!! For all those Mom's out there, I hope you enjoyed your day, too!

Staying MOtivated MO

The Journey has just begun!!!!

I had a goal this weekend. I wanted to have the scale show me that I had lost 30 pounds!! I was really focused on it and didn't allow myself to go off the schedule, eating plan or exercise...but I didn't starve myself either. Sunday was the goal - I wanted to see the number on Sunday. I normally let the scale talk to me "officially" on Sundays. Last week was the end of the Chubby Bunny Challenge, so it was Saturday - so I in fact got an extra day. What a wonderful start to my Mother's Day celebration and a great gift to myself - down 30. The best part, the scale actually gave me 1 more pound. So - I am very excited to share with all of you that as of Sunday, May 8, 2011 - I have lost 31 pounds!!!!

I did look in the mirror and I don't really see a huge difference. My clothes are seeing it, but I am not. Sorry to say, but I am being honest here. You see, I have been doing my research and according to 3 or 4 different websites I have to get rid of A LOT to get to a "goal" weight. Yes, it is time - time to tell you all - oh, this is hard for me, because I never tell anyone - not even my best friend or my closest sister what my weight is. In fact, I hate getting on the scale at my yearly doctors appointment because the look that I get. I step on the scale and the Nurse will set the mark at 200 and when I move it up past the 250 the Nurse will look at me (viewing me with that up and down head bob) and wonder why I am moving it. Then they have to move up and up with the little nob and my heart just starts to race - I hate seeing that number, but I never have done anything about it. I have been more then 250 pounds for more then 10 years. Wait - oh wait, correction - nix that - that isn't true - back in 2007 I dropped about 15 pounds and was down in the 240's, but I put it all back (and then some) just short of 1 year later. I know that I have not posted a picture on this blog, (contemplating it), but let me "paint" you a picture. I am 5'6" and I feel that I am a pretty promortioned kind of gal - I carry my weight all over the place, but hate my Dolly Parton chest (LOL) and I do thank my lucky stars that my mother & father gave me the lack of a large stick out kind of butt or huge hips....kind of funny when I write it down. I have been able to maintain my weight at about a 260, or say 265 norm for several years. That is just awful - having to say that I "maintain" such a huge size. What the heck was I thinking!! That is not healthy, but for me at the time it was what I was only able to call healthy. Heck, I even had a full physical last year and the doctor was impressed that all my "numbers" were excellent. The only concern was that there was the impending threat of diabeties, but not that bad. Numbers or not, I was ready, thought about it, talked to Mer and before you knew it I started and so glad that I did!!......so before I keep going on and on and on.....here it is....the numbers......

September to December 2010 another few or more pounds were put on, must have been that 1/2 of pie I finished off in two days.  January 2011 my official weight was 275 (yep, you read that right). According to several websites I should have a  healthy range of weight say 154 to 132, or what about this other site that says 155 to 118....or another one says 186 - man, which is it. I can lose 86 pounds or lose up to 157 - I figured I need to lose another 3 more 30's. No matter how I look at it that is a lot of weight that I am carrying around. However, I am not looking at those LARGE numbers - the final goal. What I am looking at are the little numbers - the 1 to 2 pounds per week, the numbers on my jeans that are going from 24 to 22 to 20 and I think I might be able to get into an 18 by the end of this month, even the next 10 or the next milestone - what about 40 and 50 pounds down - that for me will be an even more joyous occassion!!!

So - there you have it - my losing weight journey - how it began this last January, where I am now - currently at 244 and LOVING that I have just started my trip down the "yellow brick road". I am feeling recharged, energized, excited and taking each week as it comes. For me, this is just the beginning and for sure not the end!!!

Thanks for everyone - especially my BFF MER!!!!!!!! for helping support me, encourage me, give me a laugh from time to time. I am reaching for the BRASS ring and soon it will be in my hands and I won't let it go!!!

Staying MOtivated MO

Happy Mother's Day

For all Mom's
Wishing you a wonderful Mother's Day Weekend 

Before I was a Mom, 

I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.


Before I was a Mom, 

I had never been puked on.
Pooped on.
Chewed on.
Peed on.
I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.
I slept all night.


Before I was a Mom, 

I never held down a screaming child so doctors could do tests.
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.
 

Before I was a Mom, 

I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put them down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much. I never knew I would love being a Mom. 

 
Before I was a Mom, 

I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body..
I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.   


Before I was a Mom, 

I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth,
the joy,
the love,
the heartache,
the wonderment
or the satisfaction of being a Mom.
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much, before I was a Mom 


May you always be overwhelmed by the Grace of God
rather than by the cares of life 

Mo's May Goals

A lot of thinking went into this list - I know I can do it - going to stay fully motivated: 

• Go to bed no later then 10 pm (if not sooner) - that means....teeth are brushed, in the bed with lights turned off ready to count sheep 10 pm kind of thing....
• Wake up about 4:30 am (yes, I know it is early).
• Work out 5 days a week from 5 am until 6 am - Going to do things I enjoy, but still breaking a sweat!! On Saturday and Sunday I can sleep in, but still put in a 30 minute workout!
• Continue new eating plan for the whole month of May
• Take a walk at work at least 3 days a week. Movement is good!!!
• Try to make my Balance Ball work at my work space.
• Strive to hit the goal of being at the weight I was in 2007- almost there - about 5 more to go!!
• Strive to lose the last 14 pounds of my Aman Going to Santa Cruz Challenge. Total Challenge was to lose 20 pounds by May 27th (since March). Aman has to get his grades up. My plateau put me behind a bit, but finally broke it. I am doing well and think it just might happen.  

and on a personal note - not only to stay accountable, but I want to see other rewards, rather then just in weight change.....

• Enjoy the morning paper & breakfast out on the back porch at least 5 days a week - the weather is great and heck, I have a wonderful backyard to enjoy!!
• Each evening work on Day Camp for 2-3 hours - 200 Scouts coming in 6 weeks - OMG - what did I sign myself up for - LOL - weekends I have to work longer....its all for the kids and I do enjoy it!!
• Take a break from the Day Camp madness either on Friday or Saturday - do something for yourself, see a movie, go for a walk with a friend, get your nails done, go to the Farmers Market...try something new
• Get flowers every other week - just to brighten up your day

Staying MOtivated - Recharged - Energized - LOVING Life - MO

Just a quick moment - and a noticing moment that made me smile!!

 Well, here it is - the 3rd day of May - I started to write and write and write, but I only have a moment or two.....so this short and sweet (for me that is)...

Got to talk to Mer on Sunday. We laughed and chit chatted for just a moment - but I get to see her on Saturday and I am very excited!!! She gave me motivation to clean out my closet. So - Sunday afternoon (and rather then buying something new) I pulled out the pants I haven't worn in over - well, in a very long time - and as luck would have it many still have tags on them. Wow - how did that happen? Oh, I know - they looked good when I bought them, but not that good. Having all the intention of losing the weight or that I was losing weight at the time and I would get into them. I have gone down 2 pant sizes (with certain cuts and brands), so a few of the pants I never even put on. I just put them next to my body and they just looked too big up next to me, so why even put them on - I told myself that they were 2 sizes too big - get rid of them!! Into the Give Away Pile they went. I then realized, as long as I continue to wear that workout shirt that is too big I will never get motivated on a day to day basis. I pulled out several shirts that I have not worn in several months (t-shirt types) and made a plan to wear a different one to work out in each day - tight or not - because the next time I wore that shirt (maybe even the next week) I will start to see the difference. The scale can not be the only factor I am seeing!!!

Got up on Monday morning and realized it was a new month. I said to myself - you really need to make a month to month goal plan. You did the Chubby Bunny Challenge and you finally got past the plateau and dropped another 6 pounds - total lost as of last Saturday morning was a triumphiant 28 pounds!!! I am feeling good and never looking back.

Tuesday - water day!!! I got a huge compliment from the water guy today. He said he liked my shirt and he even put his arm around me today!! A few weeks ago it was a hug, now a nice touch - ok, ok - you are saying it is weird and he is a big flirt, but heck, I was thrilled. I totally thought about my rolls when he did it - that my pants were not hiding that roll, but I didn't waiver. I am going to get rid of those rolls and even if it is a flirting kind of thing - not only am I doing this journey for myself, but now I can see that I am doing this journey to get confidence, a "boy" to notice me and that I am looking good!!!! Yep, I am smiling right now!!

May Goal list to come in the next day or two - have to run - work is keeping me on my toes today!!!

Staying MOtivated MO