I went out the other night. It was nice not have to answer to an almost 10 year old, deal with work, have to clean the house or just be at home doing all the things that I really needed to be doing. I thought it was just going to be drinks, but it never is. I didn't meet up with my friends until sometime after 8 and had a little something to eat at about 5 to satisfy my hunger pain, but as the night out approached I heard the call of a french fry craving. I wanted a drink and was actually glad that all three of us were going to share a pitcher of beer (and I did well with only doing one glass of the delicious brew and not 2.5 like the other girls did). The girls wanted to order dinner and I thought I would just do a simple little meal, but fries with it would be great. I even told myself that I would get a "to go" box once the plate hit my table. As my selection of 4 chicken grilled sliders came to rest in front of me with the large steak size fries I was overwhelmed. Wow - that is a lot of food. But, all I really wanted were the fries. Oh, but I kept telling myself - its ok - I ate a small snack three hours ago, I can handle just a little bit of this. I finished off the first slider, but had to have 1 or 2 fries to go with it. Was proud that I didn't get the ranch dressing and only used a little bit of ketchup to satisfy my craving. But, as I started to round the corner of the second slider I felt this strange sensation - what was that - was my stomach really having pains? Oh, ouch - what is that? Was it really - could it be? No way - oh my goodness - when was the last time I ever felt this pain??? Yes - ladies and gentleman, I was having that "I am getting way too full kind of feeling" and it felt great!!!!
The last 2 sliders and only about 4 of the last 10 fries made it into the "to go" box for lunch the next day. Oh, no - really - fries for left overs - those won't be any good. I think I just did it for show, because as I was putting it away my friend turned to me and said - "what, I can't believe you didn't finish your whole plate. You did that the last time we went out". No, this comment didn't phase me. I just smiled. This friend was the first to comment on my weight loss a few weeks ago, she is aware that I am doing this lifestyle, but in the long run I don't get support. So, smiling I did.
But, oh, ouch - the pain in my stomach - it was there. As we talked, laughed and did a little bit of people watching (ok, actually it was cute guy watching - the local Hockey team came in for drinks and it made for some nice eye candy for the rest of the evening) the other girls wanted a dessert, so I agreed (peer pressure, I am not sure). I only took two bites and pretented to make it stretch out like more for effect. I left the evening feeling stuffed to the point of no return. It really was a good feeling. I haven't had that aching stomach I can't eat anymore kind of feeling in so long - silly, I know, but it was wonderful (for the moment). As soon as I got home the leftovers went into the trash and well, without any control or influence on my part my stomach decided that....well, that.....um - well - yep, that I needed to get intimate with the porcelain thrown (sorry - TMI). My stomach was rejecting my craving, or I guess you would say endulgence. The ache of that night has been with me for a few days - maybe in my head, but maybe telling me something. My stomach is getting smaller. My body is changing. I am actually doing this!! I am making progress and boy it really feels good!!! Yep - I used to eat a little snack AND have all 4 sliders, the beer and the fries all within a 4 hour period. Wow - really - how can that be? Did I really used to do that? So glad that I am making a change. So glad that my body ached and I actually listened. In the future - write down my plan in my magic notebook - stick to it and don't cave into the temptations of the restaurant world!!! Maybe a restaurant is not the right place for me right now? Things to think about - Learning from this night out and moving forward.....
Still Staying MOtivated