Plugs or No Plugs - Looking for feedback

Mo Here - Ok - so this does not have to do with my weight loss, my new lifestyle or even my exercising. Well, maybe it does have to do with a new lifestyle. I am looking for some feedback ...

I recently had Lasik Eye Surgery. I have been waiting for over 5 years to have this done, ok - well, actually FOREVER!! After many years of waiting, doing my research, taking the time to go to the eye doctor and have all the proper tests done, hearing about how successful others have been with Lasik I finally took the plunge. Veterans Day November 2010 - I finally had my surgery. Now, we have all heard the stories - it is wonderful, it is great, the best thing ever - and I really do believe that. However, in the process of having this surgery you can develop a dry eye issue. I am having that issue. I knew the risks, I was ready for it, but not sure I was ready for the next step. With my dry eyes I have been following my doctors orders to the best of my ability - taking my flag seed oil (oh, how to you spell that) and putting in my lubricant eye drops more times then I can count. However, here is the part that is scaring me....my doctor is recommending that he put in Eye Plugs. Little plugs that they will insert into the tear duct area of my eyes. They are not supposed to hurt or you don't even need to have a special "procedure" done - they just "pop" right in. Then these will help lubricate my eyes more. I have done a bit of research and even heard first hand a little bit of information I didn't really want to hear. My appointment is Tuesday. Should I get the plugs or shouldn't I??? Even with the plugs I may have to go back in for a minor touch up, but can't do the touch up until they can see that my eyes are doing better with the tears forming with the help of these plugs.

Anyone out there in blog world had this issue? What have you experienced and is there any real good link or words of wisdom / advice you can give me. Should I have the eye plugs put in, what are the risks, are there really good benefits to it. Thanks for the help!!

MO

Day 43- Choose to, not have to

When we have to do something it ends up something that we don't want to do.  I end up protesting it and not doing it in the end.  So Spangle (From 100 Days of Weight Loss) says that by changing the word to "choose" makes you in charge and affirms that you want to see results. 
So the exercise she proposes is simple- write one list with the words- "I have to...."

I have to exercise.
I have to plan my meals.
I have to go to work.
I have to do the dishes.

Then, rewrite the same list with "I choose to..."

I choose to exercise.
I choose to portion my meals.
I choose to go to work.
I choose to do the dishes.

The "I have to.." is that pushy, mother-like tone that ends with "..because I said so." I rebelled when my mom told me that. As an adult, I still feel the same way.
So just like the title of this post- choose to and you will get to the goals that you set for yourself.

REMEMBER:
YOU CAN DO IT!
JUST ONE MORE DAY!
NEVER GIVE UP!

Always,
Mer

It Really Isn't That Hard!

Tonight was an interesting struggling school homework kind of night. I got this email from my son's teacher that told me he is still having difficulty with his writing assignments. The one writing assignment that asks him to summarize up a story they have read in class. Not one where you get to create the story, but you have just read the most boring or uninteresting story of the week and you need to tell us about it on paper. How in the world can you write about it if you didn't even like it? So, this evening we have had to work on this assignment and there have been several breakdowns. Yes, we took time out for dinner and I had a meeting, but each time we have come back to the assignment there has been the constent "Its just too hard". Crying, frustration and just plain lack of drive to actually want to write about this story has been hard to watch. I tried really hard to listen, tried not to laugh (inside my head) because I could not understand what the struggle was about and why in the world he was crying, then I got frustrated. How in the world could he keep saying to me "its just too hard" I know, I know - not everything is always so easy for some and many a person will struggle with what we might think is the simplest of tasks. How can I help him on this journey?

As the evening ended, the assignment did get done for what it is worth (he still has to do a full blown write up tomorrow in class), but the quiet of the house started to settle and I realized that I too have had some "Its Just Too Hard" kind of moments. Thinking about those times when my son has said to me "Mom, we need to work out so you can lose weight" and realizing that when he gets on my eliptical I shouldn't say things like "tomorrow" or "I don't feel like it" or I even think I might have said "its just too hard" once or twice. I then got to thinking more about how I have been doing on this new journey of mine and is it really that hard? I can have my ups and downs, my highs and lows and I am sure there will be some days where I am going to be crying in the corner saying to myself "this is just too hard". Getting up in the morning out of my cozy warm bed to actually put in time to exercise has been hard. But really, is it or am I just saying that?! If it is hard for others, how are they doing it every morning no matter what? If it is easy for others, then why can't I do it?! What is holding me back?

I have decided - it really isn't that hard!!! It can't be that hard! My goal - get myself up each morning (yes, each morning) and do a little bit of exercise each day (warmth of the bed or not). 10 minutes here will grow to 20 minutes will grow to 30 and before I know it I will be saying "It Really Isn't That Hard!!! Going to change it up from time to time. A walk here, a quick sprint around the block there, some cardio on that eliptical that is collecting dust in my bedroom corner, free weights, using my new borrowed punching bag, pulling out the many exercise DVD's I have, and on and on and on...I have tons of options - it really isn't that hard!!!!

I know that we can do this together - him in his writing, me in my exercising - we are going to support each other and we will both finally be able to say

It Really Isn't That Hard!!! Success is right around the corner!!

Staying MOtivated

Day 44- It is not the right time

From 100 Days of Weight Loss (Spangle)-

This reading is about evaluating whether it is the right time on a weight loss program. I agree with Spangle that there were times in my life when I have had to put weight loss off for another time because of the big life issues that I was going through for about a decade of my life from 2000 to 2010 here are the struggles that stopped me from doing a healthy lifestyle change. This is going to get personal, but some of these times for me has been, in relative order-

• Closing a business- spouse decides to close first bakery. Heart breaking & depressing.
• Going through job changes- took on two 50% jobs that = CRAZINESS!
• Finishing my master's degree to be a principal of a school- 3 years of hellish HW & final project!
• Dealing with secondary infertility and miscarriage
• Dealing with the loss of my father
• Dealing with depression- my own and spouses
• Being pregnant- was on Weight Watchers and lost significant amount of weight, but then had to stop.
• Dealing with sleeping issues- testing & learning to sleep w/ CPAP
• Buying a bakery- 3 Bakeries in 6 years! Last two bought in 4 months if each other! Then, recession!
• Going through marriage counseling- A rough, tearful year, but brought it back together and stronger than ever.

Now, I am in a good place. I am dealing with the busy lifestyle that I lead and no major life issues.  I have a stable job, a strong marriage and 2 happy children.  This is the right time for me and nothing can stop me from taking care of myself and creating a healthy, active lifestyle.  I am on my way!

Decide for yourself- Is this the right time for you?

REMEMBER:
YOU CAN DO IT!
JUST ONE MORE DAY!
NEVER EVER GIVE UP!

Always,
Mer

Another Day - Another Dollar - Keep on going!!!!

Busy week is an understatement right now!!! There is so much work to do, no time to get it all done and I am losing it a bit at work. I have one boss, but most of the time I have over 8 other people that need things from me on a daily basis. It was tough this morning to actually get out of the car and walk into the office. I got up ok this morning, did my breakfast, read the paper, made the lunches, did my get dress kind of routine, even drove to work without really thinking about work that much. However, as I took that final turn, put my car into my spot on the gravel driveway I just didn't want to get out of the car. I am here - working - trying to get motivated to get the day's work started. I will get started, heck I even printed out the many numerous emails already, but needed a moment to reflect on my week and my past few months accomplishments.

I got a text this morning from a friend that wanted to know how I have done so well these past few months on my lifestyle. I sat for a moment and really thought about that question! How was I doing it? How has this been different? Then there is a fear!! Will I really be able to continue this journey?! I haven't been at this level of success in a really long time. What happens if I go up a pound or two or five or six? Can I control myself, will I be able to get down to my goal? What really is my goal? So many things going on with my thinking this week. I want to focus on me this week and there really isn't anytime. I am not down on myself, just having a busy kind of no time to do anything more kind of week. I really am proud of what I have accomplished, but at the moment I can't seem to feel that Cloud 9 kind of feeling. I want to feel that way, I desire to feel that way, Oh, don't get me wrong, I am still focusing on my committment to this lifestyle. As I sat down last night for a few moments to enjoy a little bit of the boop tube and for just a moment I was thinking - oh, a nice evening snack would be nice. I even contemplated making something more then a bigger "snack". Heck, the thought of those girl scout cookies talking to me from inside the freezer (with a nice glass of milk) even passed my mind for a moment. Just for that moment I fought off a bit of the brain waves and I didn't venture into the kitchen. We had just come back from a very delicious dinner of corned beef and cabbage, so I didn't need a second helping of nothing. The meal was huge and I was even proud that I left more then 1/2 of it on my plate. I even shared all but one bite of my potatoes with my son. I am doing this! I can keep doing this! I will get that Cloud 9 kind of feeling and I will be floating!

 Ok - see now I am rambling and you might just be laughing at my little rant........So - here is what I have accomplished in the last two months:

• No fast food
• No after dinner eating
• No Seconds
• Portion Control
• No Soda's
• Drinking 6 - 8 (or more) glasses of water a day
• Allowing a treat maybe once a week, but I do not go out of my way to get it
• Sleeping 6-8 hours a night (which is very hard for me, being a very busy person)
• Accomplishing the "to do" list of life on the weekends - limited the being busy atmosphere and staying at home more - helping me stay focused on me a bit more
• Pulling out of two different committments (volunteering) so I can have time for me and my son more
• Packing my lunch every work day
• Making dinner at home almost every night

I started doing all of this little by little and I am enjoying it!!! Next up - exercise on a more regular basis. I had to start with baby steps, because I have done the big steps before and I just burn myself out.  The goal for March - 3-4 times a week of exercise. Yes, I know it should be more, but baby steps for me, baby steps.

The other thing that is helping me is having support. Not only from the blog kind of world, but from friends and now my family.Thanks to all for the blog reading motivation, the inspiration, the laughter that reading your blogs bring me, the pictures, the stories....and so much more!!! 22 pounds down - so many more to go. Just one more day - I can do it!!! This week will come and go - I can do it - just one more day!!!

Staying MOtivated

Day 42- Make it Matter

"Raise the importance of your goals and make it matter." -From 100 Days of Weight Loss by Linda Spangle

List all the ways that your weight affects your life-

• How I look at myself-I want to look in the mirror and like what I see. Everyday I like the person in the mirror more and more because I am making the choice to do this healthy lifestyle for ME!
  
• My health- I want to feel good all the time- physically, mentally and emotionally!
  
• The way I fit in my clothes- I see my clothes looking baggy on me and the muffin top on my jeans is getting smaller. I want to buy new clothes for spring and summer in a new size!
  
• My energy level- I work hard, I play hard, and I want to feel tired, but not worn down at the end of the day so I fuel my body with the best things that I can give it.
  
• My relationships- I strive to be close to my spouse and to my children. I also try really hard to keep up with my close family and BFF. They all mean the world to me and I love them a lot.
  
• The way I talk to myself- I am learning to be my own best friend and I take the time to care for myself.
  
• The foods that I eat- I eat what is best for me and not give in to what I think I want. I am aware of what I am eating.
  
• The way I deal with stress- I write in my magic notebook or I talk to my friends about what is happening in my life. I am not different from anyone else. We all have challenges and celebrations to share.  I have a support system in place to help me when I need it.
  
• The way I deal with emotions- I don't like myself when I get emotional, but it is who I am and I have to take the emotional waves as them come. I accept that I am a worrier, a crier, an overwhelmed teacher, mother, spouse, and instead of finding comfort in food I talk it out, and I write it out.  I let the dust settle, I dust myself off, pick myself up and keep moving forward.
  
• My sleep- I was tested for sleep apena. I don't have it, but I still snore and have something called RERA. It was the 40th birthday gift to myself. Research say that if I lose the weight the snoring and waking myself up in the middle of the night might stop. So I strive everyday to get to my goal weight in hopes that it fixes this sleeping problem.

Here is the scale 1 to 10 that Spangle shares- Rate your list. 1- Has no effect on me whatsoever 5- Bothers me some, but not enough to do anything 10- Overwhelms me: I think about it all the time Spangle goes on to say to make these issues so important that you must see changes in them. Push their importance up the scale. MAKE THEM MATTER! And you will see improvement.  Pushing the things listed up to a 9-10 on the scale! REMEMBER: YOU CAN DO IT! JUST ONE MORE DAY! NEVER EVER GIVE UP ON YOURSELF! Always, Mer

Busy - Sick - still MOtivated

Just a quick note from the Mo of this blog part. I work in Construction and I won't say that we are busy. However, we are busy in my part of the office. I deal with the bids - the fight for the price, the paperwork, the numbers, the ups and downs of trying to get the next big job - but, nothing is coming of it. We have been busy busy busy - 5 bids this week - 5 more next week - (two on any given day). On top of that I had to deal with a sinus, cold issue from Thursday to Sunday (still a bit of a cough right now), but I am not down. I got on the scale on Sunday and it said I am down 22 pounds since my journey began in January. I am staying strong, loving my new lifestyle, realizing that I do have to exercise more to keep this journey strong, myself strong and just the world around me strong no matter what hits me. Just wanted to make sure you all know I am still out here, but taking a little bit of pause with the busy-ness of life at the moment. Have to run - meeting of the minds in the other office...........

Staying MOtivated


Can't wait to tell you about my family picture day last Sunday - the pictures are giving me the ability to know that I can look like that again someday